Top Ten things to bring on your hurricane raft

So, it’s pouring, it’s raining, it’s shitty outside.  I was building a raft out of my DVD collection and some PVC tubes and I was thinking about what I should bring on the raft.

10.  Family, if they’re not too fat.  Fat relatives will weigh the raft down.

9.  LOST DVD’s, you’re gonna want something to watch when you’re stranded on your raft for days.

8.  Portable DVD player, see above.

7.  Pets, you’re gonna get hungry.

6.  George Foreman grill, see above.

5.  Creedance tapes, for the rescue montage.

4.  Tanning lotion, take advantage of this time, get a nice tan.  It’s a disaster, so feel free to go all the way and let your junk hang out, goodbye tan lines.

3.  Beer, being drunk and stranded is way more fun than being sober and stranded.

2.  Moleskin notebook, you might as well write down your disaster travels, ordinary notebook paper is not as artistic as the moleskin, so you’ll probably be better at writing if you’re using the moleskin.

1.  Laptop, “paddle over there, I think I’m getting signal, oh wait, no let’s try over there.”

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